BLONDE ON WEIGHT LOSS
A blonde is terribly overweight, so her doctor puts her on a diet.
"I want you to eat regularly for two days, then skip a day, and
repeat this procedure for two weeks. The next time I see you,
you'll have lost at least 10 pounds."
When the blonde returns, she's lost nearly 40 pounds!
"Why, that's amazing!" the doctor says, "Did you follow my instructions?"
The blonde nods, "I'll tell you though, I thought I was going to drop
dead that third day."
"From hunger, you mean?" asked the doctor.
The blonde replied, "No, from skipping."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
BLONDE ON CARS
A blonde tried to sell her old car. She was having a lot of problems
selling it, because the car had almost 200,000 miles on it.
One day, she told her problem to a brunette she worked with at a salon.
The brunette told her, "There is a way to make the car easier to sell, but it's illegal."
"That doesn't matter," replied the blonde, "if only I could sell that car."
"Okay," said the brunette, "Here's the address of a friend of mine.
He owns a car repair shop. Tell him I sent you and he will 'fix it',
after which, it should'nt be a problem to sell your car anymore."
The following weekend, the blonde made the trip to the mechanic.
About a month after that, the brunette asked the blonde,
"So, did you ever get to sell your car?"
"No," replied the blonde, "why should I? It only has 30,000 miles on it now!"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
BLONDES ON RAMBLING
So there's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river
and sees another blonde on the opposite bank.
"Yoo-hoo" she shouts, "How can I get to the other side?"
The second blonde looks up the river then down the river,
then shouts back, "You are on the other side!"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
BLONDES ON TRACKS
Two blondes were walking through the woods
and came upon a set of tracks.
One blonde said that they were deer tracks.
The other blonde said that they were moose tracks.
They were still arguing when the train hit them.
A blonde is terribly overweight, so her doctor puts her on a diet.
"I want you to eat regularly for two days, then skip a day, and
repeat this procedure for two weeks. The next time I see you,
you'll have lost at least 10 pounds."
When the blonde returns, she's lost nearly 40 pounds!
"Why, that's amazing!" the doctor says, "Did you follow my instructions?"
The blonde nods, "I'll tell you though, I thought I was going to drop
dead that third day."
"From hunger, you mean?" asked the doctor.
The blonde replied, "No, from skipping."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
BLONDE ON CARS
A blonde tried to sell her old car. She was having a lot of problems
selling it, because the car had almost 200,000 miles on it.
One day, she told her problem to a brunette she worked with at a salon.
The brunette told her, "There is a way to make the car easier to sell, but it's illegal."
"That doesn't matter," replied the blonde, "if only I could sell that car."
"Okay," said the brunette, "Here's the address of a friend of mine.
He owns a car repair shop. Tell him I sent you and he will 'fix it',
after which, it should'nt be a problem to sell your car anymore."
The following weekend, the blonde made the trip to the mechanic.
About a month after that, the brunette asked the blonde,
"So, did you ever get to sell your car?"
"No," replied the blonde, "why should I? It only has 30,000 miles on it now!"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
BLONDES ON RAMBLING
So there's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river
and sees another blonde on the opposite bank.
"Yoo-hoo" she shouts, "How can I get to the other side?"
The second blonde looks up the river then down the river,
then shouts back, "You are on the other side!"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
BLONDES ON TRACKS
Two blondes were walking through the woods
and came upon a set of tracks.
One blonde said that they were deer tracks.
The other blonde said that they were moose tracks.
They were still arguing when the train hit them.
![[bigcry]](/images/smilies/icon_smile_bigcry.gif "Big Cry [bigcry]"){kind=icon}
![[8]](/images/smilies/icon_smile_8ball.gif "Retarded [8]"){kind=icon}
![[:D]](/images/smilies/biggrin.png "Big Grin [:D]")
